All My Love"
by SNSeaborn
Summary: Sam's mother passes on, and this fic is all about Sam and his reaction to and how he deals with it. There are some nice Josh/Donna moments in here, but it's mostly a Sam fic. Just a little warning for you… You may want to have a box of tissues handy if


Disclaimer: The characters mentioned in this story that are regular occurring characters on "The West Wing" are not mine. They belong to the illustrious Aaron Sorkin, and all his cohorts. Any additional characters are mine.  
  
Rating: PG-13 with VERY strong Angst.  
  
Notes: This fic was inspired by the story "That Only I Remember"; a story that deals with the death of Josh's mother. I have written the author asking for permission to use a similar plot device, using Sam's mother in this fic. She has given her consent; but just for the record… if you get inspired by someone else's fic, please ask their permission and it's always nice to give them credit in the opening notes of your fic.  
  
Thanks: A big thanks goes out to Christina, who has acted as my kinda-sorta beta reader for this fic. She read everything through for me when my beta- reader has been crazy nuts at work, and I am truly grateful. Mary, don't worry. You're still my number one beta!  
  
Summary: Sam's mother passes on, and this fic is all about Sam and his reaction to and how he deals with it. There are some nice Josh/Donna moments in here, but it's mostly a Sam fic. Just a little warning for you… You may want to have a box of tissues handy if you're one of those readers that has a tendency to cry at tender moments, or during times when the characters deal with tense situations. And Norma; if you want to come at me and box me over the head with an empty box of tissues, I'd be honored!  
  
Title: "All My Love"  
  
Category: Sam/Author created character, Josh/Donna (bits)  
  
Feedback: Please! Thanks for reading, and I apologize for the tissue use that may ensue…  
  
****  
  
"Hey, Sam. You got the poetry fixed yet?"  
  
"I'm working on it, just relax."  
  
"You know that the President wants it, don't you?"  
  
"Josh, I'm aware that he wants it. I just have a few other things on my mind. I told him I'd have it done in twenty minutes, okay?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
My email alert goes off.  
  
"Who's that from?"  
  
I look up at him.  
  
"Josh, do I ask you who your emails are from every time you get one?"  
  
"No. So, who's it from?"  
  
I shrug my shoulders.  
  
"I don't know. Probably from Thomson about 482. He's still pissed about our offer, but I think he knows deep down it's the best thing."  
  
"Yeah. He's a dolt."  
  
"And the pot calls the kettle black."  
  
"Hey! I resemble that remark."  
  
I shake my head and roll my eyes as I open my email inbox.  
  
"Hey! It's from Elizabeth!"  
  
"Cool! You guys still keep in touch after all these years?"  
  
"Yeah. She was one of my best friends in High School. I told you that we were the Prom King and Queen, didn't I?"  
  
"Yes you have. Many times."  
  
"Yeah. She and I went to Princeton together. She took business stuff."  
  
"That's the one that's the architect, right?"  
  
"That's the one."  
  
I start to read the email to myself, as Josh stands in the doorway.  
  
"Sam."  
  
I look up at him.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Aren't you gonna read me what it says?"  
  
"The thought had never crossed my mind, seeing as it isn't addressed to you."  
  
"Ooh. Who's the sarcastic one here?"  
  
"Let me read it over, and if there's anything in here that pertains to you, I'll read it to you. Okay?"  
  
"Okay."  
  
"Have a seat – it's a two pager."  
  
He sits in the visitors chair, and I read over my email. I read that there are a couple of things that pertain to Josh in here, so I decide to indulge him and read it out loud.  
  
"Well, she does mention you in here, so I'll read it to you. Are you happy?"  
  
"Yes. Now read."  
  
To: sam.seaborn@whitehouse.commdept.gov.org  
  
From: lizcobourn@extintdesign.com  
  
Subject: Hey Buddy!  
  
"You know, you don't have to read the email addresses to me; I already know those."  
  
I smile.  
  
"Okay."  
  
I look at the screen and begin to read.  
  
Message: "Hey Sam! I thought I would send you an update on things at home. It's been a while since we've sent emails to each other, so I thought with the State of the Union being completed, I'd send one off. (Nice job, btw on the speech. You and Mr. Ziegler did very well. Congratulate him for me, will ya? :) ) Anyway, the weather here is absolutely beautiful… California always is, isn't it? I had to rub it in that it's about 70 degrees here, and what's it in the Nation's Capitol? About 35? HA! HA! HA! Things here have been good, but business is a little slow these days. I think that the recession is hitting the businesses out here a little harder. You'd think in La-La land that there would be greater revenue, but the mayor is working on that. What are you guys doing about the recession? Any big plans in the works that you can tell me about? I remember a couple of years ago, Josh did a press briefing and mentioned something about the President's secret plan to fight inflation."  
  
Josh lets out a groan.  
  
"She remembers that?"  
  
I smile.  
  
"Yeah. Surprisingly enough, when the Deputy Chief of Staff makes an ass of himself on TV, people have the tendency to remember it. Now do you want me to continue reading this or not?"  
  
"Okay."  
  
"Anyway, all things considered, I'm keeping my head above water, and things are going well for me out here. I have to admit, and please don't stress yourself over this, I am a little concerned about your mother. She is losing a little weight, and you and I know that she's as thin as a rake in the first place. Maybe you could give her a call and tell her to eat something. We still have our Friday night dinners at my place, where we catch up on the weeks events. I really look forward to those days, you know. My mom and dad aren't around any more as you already know, and it's just nice to have a mother figure to look up to. She's really a very special lady. We watched the State of the Union at my place. I made my homemade bread, and she brought over her almost world famous beef stew. I know, I know. You're going to be jealous that I got to have some and you didn't. Well, doesn't it just suck to be you! :P We had a nice long talk about you, you know. I just thought I would prepare you for the impending call from your mother about why you aren't married. Just thought I'd give you a heads up. Anyway, my dear Sammy, take it easy, and when you get a chance, send me an email back. I'd love to hear from you, and soon! When's your vacation coming up? You should be getting one soon, shouldn't you? You gotta come back home. You can stay at the guest house here if you'd like. Bring Josh with you; it'd be a blast! Well, duty calls. Your mom is on her way over soon for our Friday night visit, and I'd better get going and put the kettle on; you know how she loves her tea. Hope to hear from you soon. Take care. All my love, Elizabeth. :)"  
  
"That was really nice, Sam. It's good that you two are close like that after all these years."  
  
"Yeah. It is, isn't it?"  
  
"Well, I gotta go. I'll tell Leo to expect the thing in about 30 minutes."  
  
"I'll have it in twenty."  
  
"Yeah, but you're gonna write her back first, so I'd say about ten minutes for that, then twenty minutes for the thing."  
  
I smile. He knows me too well.  
  
"Okay. Thanks. And Josh?"  
  
He turns back towards my office.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"When we get our vacations, you wanna go back home with me? I mean, you don't have to, but it might be nice to get away from everything for a bit. What do you think?"  
  
"I'll let you know when my days are, and we'll plan for it."  
  
"Yeah. Bring Donna. She'd love it."  
  
"You know, that's not a bad idea. I'll see what she's doing."  
  
"Kay. Thanks, buddy."  
  
Josh bangs the doorframe and heads towards his office, yelling for Donna. I shake my head and smile. Those two really are dolts, and they can't see that they're meant for each other. I direct my mouse icon to the reply box, and press it. My compose screen comes on, and I begin to type my response.  
  
To: lizcobourn@extintdesign.com.  
  
From: sam.seaborn@whitehouse.commdept.gov.org  
  
Re: Hey Buddy!  
  
Message: "Elizabeth! It was so good to hear from you! I'm sorry I haven't written you in such a long time, but with the State of the Union and all, it's been a harrowing few weeks here to say the least. Thanks for understanding. Anyway, I'm glad that, all things considered you're doing well out there. Are there any new projects in the works? I have to admit, the blueprint copies of the library you designed and sent me, were just fantastic. Again, I'm sorry I didn't send you my opinions earlier. I loved the whole design of it, and the layout was perfect. The floor plan for the media room looks absolutely fabulous. You really are very talented. When it comes time for me to buy a house, I know whom I'm getting to design it for me! :) I'm glad to know that you keep in touch with Mom on such a regular basis. She's had a rough time these past couple of years, what with the thing with Dad and all, and it kills me to not be able to be there for her. I'm glad to know that you're there for her; it means a lot to me, Liz; more than I think you'll ever know. I'm also sorry to hear that she's lost weight; that doesn't sound very good to me. I hope that you'll let me know if there's anything that I should be worried about. I'm sure she's just got a bout of the flu or something, and she'll get over it quickly enough. She always bounces right back from anything; that's my Mom. Anyway, I mentioned your generous offer to Josh. (He says hi, btw!) He said it sounded like a good plan. He and I are allowed to take our vacations very close to each other time wise, seeing as we're both deputies. I hope you don't mind, but I also suggested that he bring Donna along. You remember her, don't you? She's his assistant, although we all know that there's something more there that they are just not willing to admit to us, or to each other. Anyway, I don't think that, aside from the campaign, that she has been to CA, and I know that she would have a great time. Anyway, I have to work on the poetry for a thing I have to give to POTUS, so I have to sign off for now. Take it easy, and let me know your dinner with Mom goes! Talk to you soon! Love, Sammy."  
  
I click send, and get back to the work at hand. The poetry. God, this is the worst part. I have to get inside the head of the President, and that can be a difficult feat at best, and on an issue such as this; child welfare, it's almost impossible to word it perfectly. Oh well.  
  
"Think, Seaborn. Think."  
  
I go to put my fingers on the keyboard again, and my email alert goes off, again. That was quick. My pager goes off, and I look at the number. It's the 613 area code. Who's number is that? I think strenuously for a moment, and realize that I have no idea whose number it actually is. I suddenly have a very strange feeling in my stomach, and I really don't like it. I decide to open the email first; maybe it will preface what I will hear when I call and somewhat prepare me.  
  
To: sam.seaborn@whitehoue.commdept.gov.org  
  
From: lizcobourn@estintdesign.com  
  
Subject: THIS IS URGENT!  
  
Message: "Sam, you have to call me now. I've just paged you so you have my new cell number. I'm on the way to my car, and you can reach me at that number. I know you're there, I just got an alert that you responded to my email. Please call me, a.s.a.p. Liz."  
  
Oh god. When she sends me emails, she always signs it `All my love, Elizabeth.' It's just a thing that we do. Except when it's something serious, or when we're debating, or as she would call it, fighting over issues. Then, she just signs it Liz. I pick up the phone and dial the ten digits that appear on my pager. One ring. Two rings. Three rings.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Liz, what's going on?"  
  
"Oh thank god. I was afraid that you'd go home for the night after you responded."  
  
"I was about to go in to see the President. Why? What's going on?"  
  
"Sam, I… I…"  
  
"You what?"  
  
"Sam, I don't really know how to say this."  
  
"Say what?"  
  
Ginger walks by my office, and looks in. She can tell something's wrong, but I wave her off, and pretend that it's just a normal business call.  
  
"Well, Sam, it's about… I can't. Not like this."  
  
"Elizabeth. Please tell me what's wrong?"  
  
Josh bolts into my office.  
  
"Hey buddy. You ready?"  
  
I wave him off, and he can tell I'm in a tense conversation.  
  
"Sorry. You want me to go?"  
  
I nod, and he doesn't move.  
  
"Elizabeth? Are you still there?"  
  
"Yeah. I heard Josh, and I didn't think that I should get into this with him in the office. I know how you are, and I know you'll get all withdrawn."  
  
I start to yell.  
  
"Elizabeth, what the hell is going on? How can you tell me that there's something going on, send me an email and a page in the span of thirty seconds, both marked urgent, and then not tell me what's going on?"  
  
Josh looks up at me.  
  
"Sam? You ok?"  
  
I look at him.  
  
"Just peachy."  
  
Elizabeth begins to talk, and she sounds calm, cool and collected.  
  
"Sam, I have to tell you this, and I want you to sit down. Promise me."  
  
"Ok. I'm sitting down."  
  
"No you're not. Sit in your chair, not leaning on the desk."  
  
"You got me. I'm sitting in my big chair, in my big office, in the big White House, in the big United States of America. Now, what is so damn important that you don't know how to tell me?"  
  
She speaks quietly.  
  
"Sam, it's your mother."  
  
I can't speak. I can't think. Something's wrong with my mother. The woman that brought me into this world. Oh god. I can't catch my breath. Josh notices this, and yells out to Donna who is walking by my office towards Ginger's desk, and comes running into my office.  
  
"Get Sam some water."  
  
She looks at me, and runs out to get some ice and a pitcher of water. Josh comes over to me, and leans on the desk facing me.  
  
"Sam? Buddy? What's wrong?"  
  
Donna re-appears almost instantly with a pitcher of water and a bucket of ice. I hand Josh the phone.  
  
"Elizabeth?"  
  
I can't even nod in response.  
  
"Elizabeth? It's Josh. What's going on here, Sam's in shock."  
  
"Thank god you're there, Josh. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if he had been alone; god knows what he would have done."  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"Josh, Sam's mother is very sick. I just got a phone call from a neighbor that she collapsed in her apartment."  
  
"Oh my god."  
  
"Yeah. She's been taken to the L.A. General Hospital, and is in the Emergency ward. I'm expecting a phone call on the other line from her neighbor any minute now."  
  
"Is it serious?"  
  
"Apparently so. She has cancer, Josh. Apparently it's bad, really bad. She only told her neighbor, because she was worried that if she was in her apartment and something happened, no one would be able to get there quickly enough. Apparently she called her neighbor and told her that she was feeling ill, and the neighbor came over right away. She knocked on the door and there was no response. She used the key that Mrs. Seaborn gave her and opened the front door. She searched the place and found Mrs. Seaborn collapsed on the kitchen floor. She called 9-1-1 and the ambulance came and took her to the hospital. She's not doing well, Josh. I'm afraid for her, but for Sam too. He is so much his mother's son, and if the worst happens…"  
  
"Elizabeth, listen to me. You can't start to cry, for a couple of reasons. Number one, you're driving, and you don't want to cause an accident. Number two, you need to be strong for Mrs. Seaborn. She's gonna need you until Sam gets there, and you need to be there for her. Number three, you need to be strong for Sam. He's gonna need you, more than anything. You know him better than any of us could ever hope to, or would like to for that matter."  
  
"Thanks, Josh. I needed to smile. Will Sam be able to get away for a while to come home and visit his mother?"  
  
"That won't be a problem at all. Even if it were, we'd deal with it. You focus your attention on Mrs. Seaborn, and we'll take care of Sam. I'll have Donna call a travel…"  
  
"Already done, Josh. Sam leaves tonight, well this morning, at 2:15 our time out of Regan International, and will arrive at LAX at 3:43 am, local time. I called Leo and told him what was going on, and he said that Sam should take all the time he needs; family is the most important thing. I also am taking the liberty of going to his place for an hour or so, and packing a few things for him, if that's ok with you, Josh."  
  
"That's perfect."  
  
"Josh, you know I'm still on the phone, right?"  
  
"Sorry. Donna just told me that Sam has a flight that arrives at LAX at about 4 this morning. We'll arrange to have a car there waiting for him."  
  
"Yeah. Mine."  
  
"Elizabeth, I can't ask you to do that."  
  
"You can't, so I'm offering. It's the least I can do. Besides, he doesn't know how to get to my new place, and he can stay in the guest house. It's no trouble. Josh, this is what I'm gonna do. I'm just about at the turn off for the hospital, and I'm gonna go in and get an update. I'll call every hour on the hour to fill you all in on what's going on."  
  
"Okay. You have the number?"  
  
"Yeah. Call display and the memory function are wonderful features on cell phones."  
  
"Yeah. They are."  
  
"Josh, hand me the phone."  
  
"Elizabeth, Sam wants to talk to you. Take it easy, okay? And be sure to give Mrs. Seaborn our best wishes."  
  
"I will, Josh. Thanks."  
  
"Here you go, Sam."  
  
"Liz?"  
  
"Yeah, Sam?"  
  
"How bad is it?"  
  
"Truthfully, Sam. I really don't know. I'll find out when I get to the hospital. I told Josh, and I'll re-iterate what I said to Josh. I'll call every hour on the hour and give you updates. Do me a favor?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Go do your thing with the President because that's important, then I want you to go home and rest for a few hours. Drink some tea, and get your strength up. I know you hate red-eye flights, but that's all Donna could get you on such short notice."  
  
I look up at Donna, my mouth still hanging open in shock.  
  
"Huh? You got me a flight already?"  
  
She hangs her head down a little, trying to be modest.  
  
"Yeah. I'm sorry it's a red-eye, but at least the seats are first class."  
  
I smile and whisper.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
She puts a gentle hand on my face.  
  
"You're welcome. Let's get your meeting over with, and then we'll head to your apartment and pack a bag for you, okay?"  
  
"Okay. Liz, I've gotta go do some things."  
  
"Okay. Could I talk to Donna for a second?" I'm a little surprised by the request, but I hold the phone to Donna.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Donna? This is Elizabeth. We met a couple of times when the campaign was in California. Do you remember?"  
  
"Yes, of course. What can I do for you?"  
  
"Well, I know that this may be asking too much, and if you say no, I understand."  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Well, I couldn't help but overhear that after a meeting with the President that you are taking Sam back to his place to pack a bag."  
  
"Yes, that's true, but don't worry. There's nothing going on…"  
  
"Donna, I'm not worried about that. I was just wondering if you might be able to make him some tea, and to see that he rests for a couple of hours. He doesn't like to trouble anyone, and I know he would never outright ask you to do that, so I'm asking on his behalf. I would do it myself, but it's a little difficult seeing as I'm in California and he's there."  
  
"That's no trouble at all. I looked after Josh after the thing; don't worry, this is no trouble at all. And believe me, Josh is a much bigger baby than Sam."  
  
"Hey!"  
  
"Hey what? You are."  
  
"True."  
  
"Donna, thank you. I appreciate it more than you could ever know."  
  
"No problem. Any friend of Sam's is a friend of ours. Take it easy, and let us know how things are going."  
  
"I will. Thanks again. Please give Sam a hug for me."  
  
"I will. Good bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
****  
  
Charlie exits the office and speaks to us.  
  
"You can go in now."  
  
I walk behind Sam as we go into the Oval Office, where the President and Leo are waiting for us.  
  
"Good afternoon, Sir."  
  
"Josh. How are things?"  
  
"Okay, I guess, Sir."  
  
"Good."  
  
He turns his attention to Sam, and extends an arm to him, wrapping it around his shoulder.  
  
"Sam. Leo told me. Please believe me when I tell you that nothing is more important than family. You take all the time you need, ok?"  
  
He looks up at the President, and tried not to show his red and puffy eyes.  
  
"Thank you, Sir. But I'll be fine. Shall we get to it?"  
  
"Are you ok to do so?"  
  
"Mr. President. All due respect, but there is an agenda, and we have to follow it. I'll be just fine."  
  
"Ok. If at any time, though."  
  
"Thank you, Sir. I'll be ok."  
  
"Alright. Have a seat everyone."  
  
We go through the meeting, and Sam seems to be his old self. Working through the poetry was difficult, he said, but he somehow managed to get it done to the President's satisfaction. The wording is locked, and the President gives Sam a contented smile.  
  
"You do good work, Sam."  
  
Sam smiles at him.  
  
"Thank you very much, Sir."  
  
"I think that's it everyone. Have a good day."  
  
We all stand, and the President asks Sam to stay behind.  
  
"Certainly, Sir."  
  
****  
  
"Have a seat, son."  
  
"Thank you, Sir."  
  
We look at each other for a moment, all the while I am waiting for him to say something. I know he won't because he is very adamant when it comes to rules. He never speaks to me unless I instigate the conversation; it's just the way he is.  
  
"Sam, what are your plans?"  
  
He looks up at me.  
  
"I'm sorry, Sir?"  
  
"What are your plans? When are you going home?"  
  
"Well, Donna booked me a flight that leaves early this morning. I have some things to finish up here, and I have a meeting with Thomson about the thing."  
  
"Toby can handle that, Sam."  
  
"But Sir, I…"  
  
"I said, Toby can handle that. You have things that you need to take care of. I told you before that family is the most important thing. If anything were to happen to Abbey or any of my children or my grandchild, I would lose it. This job is not as important as my family, and I can definitely say that yours is not as important as your family."  
  
"But there's a lot of things…"  
  
"No buts, Samuel. If I have to issue an executive order, I will. Do you really want it to come to that?"  
  
He smiles and lowers his head, his hands clasped together.  
  
"No, Sir. That won't be necessary."  
  
"Good. This is what you're going to do. You are going home, and you are going to pack some things to take with you. You're going to get a few hours rest, and you know that won't happen if you're here. You're going to need your strength over the next few days, and I know that your mother will need you to be strong for her. When did you find out she was in the hospital?"  
  
"My friend Elizabeth sent me an email, and she paged me about an hour ago."  
  
"That's the architect?"  
  
"Yes, Sir."  
  
"She seems like a lovely girl."  
  
"She is, Sir. She spends time with my mother, and fills me in on all the details; she really is a good friend."  
  
"I'm glad to hear it. I know how highly you regard family and friends, and it's a very good thing. You've known her a long time?"  
  
"Since high school. We were the Prom King and Queen for our graduating class."  
  
"Wow, that's a long time. It's good to know that you've kept in touch all these years."  
  
"Yeah. She is great."  
  
"Well, I'm not going to keep you any longer. You go back to your office and wrap things up for the day. I'll have Nancy call Toby and arrange to meet with me about your meetings for the rest of the day."  
  
"I can do that, Sir. It's not a problem."  
  
"Sam."  
  
"Alright, Sir. I relent."  
  
"Good. I'm glad to see that I still have some respect around this place."  
  
"You have my complete respect, Sir. Please don't ever doubt that."  
  
I stand up, and as soon as I do, he stands as well.  
  
"Believe me when I tell you that I don't doubt it. I was just trying to get you to smile, Sam."  
  
He smiles, and I extend my hand to him. He accepts it, and I pull him towards me for a hug.  
  
"Go spend time with your family, Sam. Report back to me when you get any new information."  
  
"I certainly will, Sir. Thank you."  
  
"Thank you. You're all in our thoughts and prayers."  
  
"That means a lot, Mr. President. Thank you very much."  
  
"I know you're not Catholic, but I'll make sure to say a special prayer for you this evening; so will Abbey."  
  
He smiles.  
  
"That means a lot, Sir. Thank you."  
  
"Okay. Get out of here. Go home."  
  
He heads to the door, and turns the handle.  
  
"Thank you, Mr. President."  
  
"Thank you, Sam."  
  
He exits my office, and I stand in the middle of the room, make the sign of the cross and lift my eyes skyward.  
  
"Our Father, which art in heaven…"  
  
****  
  
There's a knock on my door.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
The door opens, and Josh's head pokes around the door.  
  
"Hey buddy. How ya doin'?"  
  
"Fine. You?"  
  
"You want company?"  
  
"Not really. I have a whole pile of things to do before I go tonight, and I have to make sure everything's looked after."  
  
"Sam, that's not what I meant."  
  
"What did you mean, then, because I really don't have time to be sitting here having a friendly chat."  
  
He stands beside my desk, looking at me with that brotherly look he gives me every once in a while.  
  
"Sam. I wanted to ask you if you wanted me and Donna to come with you. Not for…"  
  
"Donna and me, Josh. Donna and me."  
  
He smiles. Despite everything I can still find the funny.  
  
"Fine. I wanted to know if you wanted Donna and me to come with you to California. You know. Moral support."  
  
"Thanks, but I think I'll be okay. Besides, you guys have things to do here what with the CWA wordings being locked and all. I'll be ok."  
  
"You sure?"  
  
"Yeah. I'll be fine. Besides, Elizabeth is gonna meet me at the airport, and…"  
  
My phone rings and I grab it faster than I thought possible.  
  
"Sam Seaborn."  
  
"Sam, it's me. As per my promise, I'm giving you your hourly call."  
  
"How is she?"  
  
"Well, she's stable, but it's the same as before. I'm so sorry, hun."  
  
It's bad. She never calls me hun.  
  
"Ok. I'm about to head back to my place and collect a few things. I know that you aren't supposed to use cell phones on the planes, but page me if there's any change, and I'll use the phone on the plane to call you back, okay?"  
  
"You got it. I'll see you soon, Sam."  
  
"Yeah. Give Mom a kiss for me, and tell her I'm on the way."  
  
"I will. Bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
I put the phone back on the receiver, and Josh puts his hand on my shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze.  
  
"I'm so sorry, buddy. If there's ever anything I can do…"  
  
My head is in my hands.  
  
"I know. Thanks."  
  
"You want me and Donna, I mean, Donna and I to help you pack?"  
  
"That might be nice. Thanks. Just let me finish this thing up here, ok?"  
  
"You got it. Give me a call when you're ready."  
  
"Will do. Thanks."  
  
"Any time, Sam. Any time."  
  
****  
  
It's about 2:45, local time in California. There's been a strong tail wind, so we're flying a bit faster than we expected. It's just like Donna to book me on a non-stop flight. I think she knows that if we had to do a lay-over somewhere that I would go out of my mind. I have to remember to thank her for that when I see her next. I feel my pager vibrate, and I pull it off my belt, looking at the number. It doesn't look familiar, so I get out of my seat, and head to the public phone, located in between first class and coach. I dial the numbers. One ring. Two rings.  
  
"Thank you for calling the Los Angeles General Hospital. To access our main switchboard, please press `0' and the first available operator will assist you."  
  
I hate voice mail. I press `0' and I am instantly connected to the receptionist.  
  
"L.A. General, how may I help you?"  
  
"Yes, this is Sam Seaborn. I was just paged. My mother is there, and I'm sure that the page is about her. Is it possible to connect me…"  
  
"One moment, Mr. Seaborn. I'll put you through."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
The call clicks over, and I hear the phone ring once. A sad voice quietly picks up the phone, and I can tell she's been crying.  
  
"Hello."  
  
"Liz. Oh my god. What's going on?"  
  
"Oh, Sam…"  
  
She cries a little; I can hear it in her voice. It's just like her to do this when I can't be there to help her.  
  
"Elizabeth, don't cry. Please don't cry. Tell me what's happened."  
  
She takes a moment, breathes deeply, and collects her thoughts.  
  
"Sam, it's bad; worse than I thought. She's been fading in and out of consciousness, and she has few moments when she has lucid thoughts. I don't think I'll be able to come to the airport to pick you up, but I'll have a car waiting there for you."  
  
"That's fine, Liz. I wouldn't want you to leave Mom anyway. I'd kick your ass if you did that, you know."  
  
She laughs. It worked.  
  
"I know, Sammy. I know."  
  
"I'll be there soon, Liz. Hang on, ok?"  
  
"I will. Try and rest a little, ok Sam?"  
  
"I'll try, but I might not be successful."  
  
"Me either."  
  
I hear a voice come over the P.A. System in the plane.  
  
"Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. We are about to begin our descent into Los Angeles. Please return to your seats, fasten your seatbelts, and return your chairs to the upright positions. Thank you."  
  
"Elizabeth, I gotta go. I'll be there as soon as I can. Stay strong, ok?"  
  
"I will. You too. Bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
As I'm about to hang up the phone, I hear her call my name.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"All my love, Sam."  
  
"Thanks. I needed that."  
  
"Ok. We'll see you soon."  
  
With that, I hang up the phone, and return to my seat, looking out the window at the black sky; the brilliant lights of the airport shining below.  
  
"Hold on, Mom. I'm coming."  
  
****  
  
I approach the reception desk at the hospital.  
  
"Good morning. Could you please direct me to Marilyn Seaborn's room please?"  
  
"I'm sorry, Sir. But visiting hours aren't until 7 am."  
  
"I'm well aware of that, but my mother is very ill. This is the fastest I could get here. Please, let me go and see my mother."  
  
"I'm desperately sorry, Sir. But I am not allowed to let anyone in to rooms to visit patients at this time."  
  
"Sam?"  
  
"Elizabeth. Thank God. I want to see her."  
  
She puts her arm around me and takes hold of my tote bag, as I pull my suitcase.  
  
"Of course. I'll show you the way."  
  
We walk a few feet, and we get to the elevator. The doors open, and we walk inside, her arm never leaving it's hold of my waist.  
  
"Sam, I want to warn you of what you'll see."  
  
"Ok."  
  
"She's very weak. She has been hooked up to a ventilator through tubes in her nose. She is still able to speak, when she's conscious and able to do so."  
  
"Has she said anything recently?"  
  
She shakes her head.  
  
"I'm sorry, honey. She hasn't said anything or woken up since about 3 p.m. The doctors say that when she wants to wake up, she'll know when she has enough strength to do so, and will. That's all I can really tell you; they wouldn't say much to me, because I'm not family."  
  
I turn and look at her.  
  
"Elizabeth. You ARE family. You are one of the best friends I have ever had, and if that doesn't count as family, then I don't know what does."  
  
"Thanks, Sam. That means a lot."  
  
The elevator door opens, and we step out. She gently takes my hand.  
  
"This way, Sam."  
  
I follow as she leads me down the hall, and she smiles at the nurses on the way, and they smile back.  
  
"Thanks for the coffee, Nancy. I appreciate it."  
  
"It's no problem, Miss. If there's anything I can do, please don't hesitate."  
  
"Would it be possible to get coffee for my friend?"  
  
"No problem. I'll be back in a few minutes."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
We reach the door, and she steps beside me as I look in through the small glass panel.  
  
"Sam. Are you gonna be ok?"  
  
I keep my attention focused on my Mom, but I respond.  
  
"Yeah. I'll be fine."  
  
"Do you want me to stay out here to give you some time alone?"  
  
I turn to look at her.  
  
"No. I'd like you to come in with me. If you wouldn't mind."  
  
She puts her hand to my cheek.  
  
"I'd be honored, Sam. Let's go."  
  
We open the door and cautiously walk in; not wanting to disturb the eerie peace that's in the room. I get to the side of the bed, and turn to look at Elizabeth. She's staying by the door, not wanting to invade.  
  
"Would it be ok if I sat on the side of the bed?"  
  
She nods her head.  
  
"I think it would be ok. Go ahead. I'll just stay here to give you two some time."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
She gets a chair and brings it to the door, and sits down, watching my mother and I. I take my Mother's frail hand in mine, and run my thumb along the top of her hand. I whisper softly to her.  
  
"Hi Mom. It's me. I got here as soon as I could. You're gonna be just fine, Mom. I know it."  
  
There is a little movement from her eyes, as though she's trying to open them.  
  
"That's it, mom. You can open your eyes. You can do it."  
  
She slowly opens her eyes and looks directly at me.  
  
"Samuel?"  
  
I smile, tears starting to form in my eyes.  
  
"That's right, Mom. It's me."  
  
"They sent for you."  
  
"Elizabeth did. She was worried, so she got me here as soon as she could."  
  
"She's a good girl, Sam. Treat her well."  
  
I lower my head a little, and promise her that I will.  
  
"Sam, I have to tell you a few things."  
  
"Okay."  
  
I hear the sound of the door opening, and turn just in time to see Elizabeth walking out of the room. I turn back to mom and I can see her smile.  
  
"She wanted us to have some time alone, I suspect."  
  
"Yes, Sam. It was my request."  
  
"I don't understand. She told me that the last time you were conscious was earlier this afternoon."  
  
"And I told her that when you came here, if I were to wake up; no matter how long or short the time, that I wanted to have a few moments alone with my son."  
  
I smile.  
  
"She didn't want to intrude."  
  
"I know, Sam. That's why I asked, so don't question your mother, alright?"  
  
That's my Mom. Ordering me around as per usual.  
  
"You got it. So when are you gonna get out of here?"  
  
"I'm not going to, Sam. That's why I…"  
  
"What do you mean you're not getting out of here? You're gonna be fine. They'll give you chemo and you'll be fine. Mom, you can't possibly be serious…"  
  
"Samuel, I don't know how much time I have left, and I'm starting to get really weak, so please just listen to me, ok?"  
  
I nod my head, not really wanting to hear my mother's final words, but this is my mother and I have to.  
  
"Ok."  
  
"There are a few things that I need you to know before the inevitable happens…"  
  
****  
  
"Excuse me, Miss? Here's your coffee, and one for your friend."  
  
I turn and look at the nurse, who is behind me.  
  
"Thank you very much. He's in with his mother now. She's talking to him."  
  
She looks at me with a sad expression.  
  
"Something told me that she would wait until he got here. She spoke of him when she would come in for treatment, and she regards him so highly."  
  
"That she does. I have to tell you that I appreciate you being so kind to me while I've been here, Nancy. Thank you so much for that."  
  
"It's no problem, Miss."  
  
"It's Elizabeth, please."  
  
"No problem. She's a very classy lady, and anything that we can do to make her friends and family more comfortable, we are more than willing…"  
  
I hear a sound from inside the room, and it sounds like a constant beep. We stop what we're doing, as the coffee I'm holding goes flying on the ground, and I stop at the door. The sight I see is heartbreaking. Sam, holding his mother's hand, his head on her chest, and tears falling from his eyes. Nancy enters the room, and I follow behind her.  
  
"Mr. Seaborn. I'm so sorry."  
  
He pulls his head up from his mother's chest, and responds quietly.  
  
"Thank you. Thank you for everything. For being so kind to her, to Elizabeth, it means a great deal to me."  
  
"You're welcome, Sir. Do you need anything?"  
  
"No, thank you."  
  
"Take all the time you need, Sir. If you need anything, we're right outside."  
  
He looks at her and offers a weak smile as his expression of gratitude. She walks to the heart monitor and the ventilator, and turns the machines off; creating a peculiar silence in the room. As she does, she places a gentle hand on Sam's back, then quietly leaves the room. I approach him and stand beside him, a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"She looks peaceful, Sam."  
  
He rests his chin on his hand, which is still clasping his mother's.  
  
"Yeah, she does."  
  
He looks up at me.  
  
"Thank you for being here for her, Elizabeth."  
  
"I wouldn't have been anywhere else, Sam."  
  
He sits up, and gently takes the blankets and brings them up under her arms, tucking her in as she had no doubt done for him, so many times as a child.  
  
"She loved Shakespeare."  
  
"She did, Sam. That's where you got your love for literature. She's the reason you have so many of your attributes; you got them from your mother."  
  
He runs his fingers along side her face, and kisses her on the forehead. He whispers to her.  
  
"Give rest O Lord to your hand maid, who has fallen asleep."  
  
He turns and looks at me, and I hold out my arms to him. He lowers his head, and I take him in my arms; comforting him in this very difficult time. After a few moments, he looks at me.  
  
"I need to call Josh."  
  
I nod my head and speak softly.  
  
"Ok. Do you want to call from here, or do you want to go?"  
  
"I think we should go. Let the staff do what they need to do."  
  
"Ok. Let's go."  
  
I walk up to Mrs. Seaborn, and grasp her hand for the last time.  
  
"I'll never forget my promise to you, Ma'am. Thank you so much."  
  
I kiss the tips of my fingers and place them on her cheek. I turn to Sam, and he holds out a hand for me.  
  
"Are you ready?"  
  
"As long as I have someone with me, I'll be just fine."  
  
"Well, I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be by your side. Don't you forget that, Samuel Norman."  
  
He smiles a faint smile at me, and opens the door for me. As we walk out, Nancy approaches us.  
  
"Elizabeth. Mr. Seaborn. Please let me say again how very sorry I am for your loss."  
  
"Thank you. That means a lot."  
  
"Sam needs to make a few phone calls, and he thought it best if we weren't here when the staff do their thing. We're going to head out."  
  
"I have to tell you this, though. Someone has told the press that your mother was here, Mr. Seaborn. I just thought I would warn you that there may be press at the entrances."  
  
He sighs.  
  
"Good god, can't they ever leave me alone? It's not like this has anything to do with the Administration, for god's sake."  
  
I put my hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down.  
  
"Sam, I parked in the underground lot. Let's go out that way, ok?"  
  
"You won't run into any press that way, Mr. Seaborn. There will be plenty of security there, and they will ensure your privacy. Ok?"  
  
He nods.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"You're very welcome. She always talked about how wonderful her son was. I can see now how right she was. You're very lucky, Elizabeth."  
  
"You are lucky when you have a friend as wonderful as he is, aren't you?"  
  
We share a little laugh, then head to the elevator, and press the button for the underground garage. I rub my hand along Sam's back as his grip on his suitcase is loosening a little.  
  
"You ok?"  
  
"I will be. I have to call Josh."  
  
"Ok. Wait until we get out of the garage, ok? You'll have a better signal then."  
  
He nods his head.  
  
"Ok. Thanks, Liz. For everything. I mean that."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
****  
  
About twenty minutes later, we're driving towards the main part of town, and I can see that the sun is very slowly starting to rise. It never ceases to amaze me how beautiful the sun looks, coming up over the expanse of the California horizon.  
  
"You know, Sam. I don't quite feel like going home yet. Do you?"  
  
"Where am I gonna go?"  
  
She laughs.  
  
"YOU are not going anywhere. I want you to come somewhere with me; see if I got a good buy."  
  
"I already told you, I like this car. I never thought I would like a SAAB, I've always been a Beamer kind of guy."  
  
"I know that, Sam. I'm not talking about a car. Just humor me, ok?"  
  
She casts a short glance in my direction, and smiles. I return it.  
  
"Ok."  
  
I know what she's trying to do. She's trying to get my mind off things, at least for a little while. That's what she does; she knows what's best for me, especially when I can't think straight. We've driven towards the harbor, and we're entering the gate of the marina. She bought a boat? When did that happen?  
  
"Liz, what are we doing here? You know that the boat was sold when I moved to New York, and I haven't been out on a boat in a long, long time."  
  
"I know that, Sam. That's why it's high time you got back out there."  
  
She parks the car and collects my tote bag, and I grab my suitcase. We start to walk along the dock, and I observe the beautiful crafts that are docked here.  
  
"These really are beautiful, Liz."  
  
"Yeah, they are, aren't they?"  
  
"Here we are. Well Sam? What do you think?"  
  
"She's magnificent! When did you get her?"  
  
"About 6 months ago. I didn't tell you, because I wanted to bring you here as a surprise when you came for your vacation."  
  
She puts her head down and gets quiet as she continues.  
  
"I thought, with everything going on now, that you might want to get away from civilization for a little while; take a sail around the harbor."  
  
"I'd love to. I think that would be a very good idea."  
  
She steps on to the boat, and extends her hand for me.  
  
"Welcome aboard, Mr. Seaborn."  
  
I smile.  
  
"Why, thank you very much. Seriously, Liz. She is truly fantastic."  
  
"Would you like the 50 cent tour?"  
  
"Lead the way."  
  
"Ok. This is the main deck, for obvious reasons. Watch your head on the boom, Sam."  
  
I put my hand up to block my head from hitting it.  
  
"Down here we have the cabin area, with room for four people. There's a little kitchen over here; a little bathroom right through those doors over there, and there's even a TV in the wall."  
  
She opens the cupboard door and reveals a TV and VCR, with lots of movies to choose from.  
  
"See?"  
  
I smile.  
  
"Why Mr. Seaborn, I do believe you showed me an honest smile. Does that mean you approve of my purchase?"  
  
"Yes. I definitely do. Shall we take the little lady out for a spin?"  
  
"Only if you'll do the honors."  
  
"You got it. It's been a while, though."  
  
"No worries."  
  
She stands in front of me, and purses her lips.  
  
"What is it?"  
  
"Something's missing."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Wait here. I have it in the drawer."  
  
She goes to the kitchen and pulls the bottom drawer out. She has her hand behind her back, and won't let me see what she has.  
  
"Now, stand right there."  
  
"I'm not going anywhere, Liz."  
  
"Good."  
  
She puts her hands around my waist, then I feel her putting something on top of my head.  
  
"Perfect. Now we can go."  
  
"Is this…"  
  
"Yeah. It's the captain's hat you wore when we first went sailing in High School. You remember?"  
  
I smile.  
  
"I can't believe you kept this."  
  
"Yeah? Well, what are you gonna do."  
  
"You're amazing. Let's go."  
  
****  
  
We've been on the water for about an hour, sailing around the harbor, watching the sun slowly rise. He looks so peaceful out there, it's a wonder that he didn't get into professional sailing. I've been down in the cabin, trusting him to control the boat as I do a little work down here. It's a shame that I don't get out here as often as I'd like; even if it's just to sit here while she's docked. I turn off the boiling kettle, and make two cups of tea, and head up the steps to where I find Sam sitting at the bow, looking lost in his thoughts as he is watching the oceans' waves curl over themselves.  
  
"Sam?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Would you like some tea?"  
  
He smiles.  
  
"Yeah. I think I would. Thanks."  
  
"Here you go, just the way you like it."  
  
He takes a sip, and realizes how hot it is.  
  
"That's good. Thanks."  
  
"Be careful it doesn't burn your tongue."  
  
"Thanks for the advanced warning."  
  
I sit down beside him, both of us in sweaters to guard us from the chill of the morning's ocean breeze. A few moments pass by in silence, both of us drinking our tea, and looking at the ocean water.  
  
"Penny for your thoughts."  
  
"You wanna know something?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
"The first time I went out on the water was on my father's boat. My Mom and Dad were so much in love back then, or at least it seemed, and the boat was huge. Well, at least it seemed huge to me at the time. I was only 7 or 8 then."  
  
"Pretty much everything seems big when you're that age."  
  
"Yeah. I told my Mother that I felt so small when I looked out at the water; seeing the vast expanse of clear blue water. She told me that I'll always feel small when I look at the ocean, but that doesn't mean that I am small."  
  
"Very wise words."  
  
"Yeah. She told me that even at times when I would feel so small and insignificant, that one person can make all the difference. It didn't matter the size of the person, the size of the heart was what mattered most."  
  
"As usual, your Mother was right."  
  
We sip from our mugs of tea, looking again at the ocean. A few moments later, he lowers his head.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
I look at him.  
  
"For what?"  
  
"For bringing me out here. I appreciate it."  
  
I lean my head on his shoulder.  
  
"It's no problem."  
  
"Why is it that you always know what I need?"  
  
"Probably because I know you, Sam."  
  
He rests his head on top of mine, and we sit like that for a moment. The alarm on his watch goes off, and he sits up.  
  
"Liz, I'm sorry to do this, but I have to watch the briefing."  
  
"Sam, I don't think that you need to watch the briefing. I think they'll understand if you miss a couple."  
  
"But Liz, it's the CWA. That's gonna be headline news, and I need to keep up with it."  
  
"Is there any way I'll win this one?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Alright. Come on down; I'll turn C-Span on for ya."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
He follows me into the cabin downstairs, just as the picture on the TV is coming in. We sit beside each other, feet up on the coffee table, as we watch C.J. take her place at the podium.  
  
"Good morning everyone, please take your seats. I'd like to start off the morning briefing on a personal note. This will be the last briefing that I will be doing for a few days. Simon will be taking my place at the briefings for an undefined period of time. Yes, Matthew."  
  
Sam looks at me.  
  
"What the hell?"  
  
"You got me."  
  
"C.J. Is the reason that you are leaving on this temporary basis something you can disclose to the press?"  
  
"Well, let me finish the rest of my briefing and it will explain it. The President, First Lady and the rest of the Administration wish to send our heart-felt sympathies to Deputy Communications Director Sam Seaborn. His mother passed away at approximately 3:30 a.m., Pacific Time. I know that Sam will be watching this briefing as he always does; so Sam, please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers."  
  
"Damn her."  
  
"What?"  
  
"She's coming here to lend me moral support, Liz. I know it."  
  
"Well, there are things in life that are worse than that, you know."  
  
"I know, it's just… I don't want to have to put on a show for people right now. I mean, I love them, but I just don't know if I can take them all hovering around; worrying about me."  
  
"Sam, if you have to, think of it this way. She's the Press Secretary. She's doing her job, seeing to it that the members of the Administration are ok, and that everything is running as expected. Does it help if you think of it like that?"  
  
"Kinda, I guess."  
  
"C.J. When you speak with Sam, please tell him, on behalf of the White House Press Corps, that he has our sympathies, ok?"  
  
"I will, Danny. Thanks. Now, let's move on to the major stories of the day. The amendments to the Child Welfare Act have had their wordings locked. The President is very pleased that things are going so well, and he plans to meet with members of the CWA sometime after his security briefing at 4 this afternoon. Following that there will be a briefing to introduce the proposals so you will be able to…"  
  
I stand up and shut off the TV.  
  
"See? It's work. Don't stress yourself over it, ok?"  
  
"Ok."  
  
He examines the inside of his mug.  
  
"You want some more?"  
  
"No. I think I need to sleep for a bit; I'm exhausted and I'm sure that there will be people calling all day wanting pieces of me everywhere."  
  
I put my hand on his cheek and smile.  
  
"Okay. Let's go home."  
  
****  
  
"This is a beautiful house, Liz. You out did yourself."  
  
"Well, if my house can't be free advertising for what I do for a living, what good is it?"  
  
I smile.  
  
"You've got a point."  
  
"Let me help you with those, Sam."  
  
"I've got it."  
  
"Sam…"  
  
"Ok, ok. Here's the bag. You can carry that one."  
  
"Ok."  
  
We walk up the front steps of her beautiful house, and I walk inside; taking in the beautiful sight.  
  
"Wow."  
  
"I don't think it's deserving of a wow, Sam. I mean, you're at the White House every day. Now that house is definitely worthy of a wow. Now, you have two choices. You can stay in one of the guest rooms, or you can stay in the guest house; wherever you would feel more comfortable."  
  
"Anywhere is fine."  
  
"Well, what about the guest house? You'll have a beautiful view of the grounds, and you'll have complete privacy whenever you need it. I can't say as much for the main house, there's always people coming and going."  
  
"Whatever you think is best."  
  
"Ok. Let's get you over there, and I'll let you get settled in."  
  
"Lead the way."  
  
We walk out the back doors, along side the pool, and about 100 feet past the garden.  
  
"Here's the key, Sam. I'll give you a little tour, then I'll leave you to get settled. This is the living room, which is pretty obvious given that there's a couch and a TV in here. Through those doors to your left is the bedroom, and the en-suite is pretty easy to find once you're in there. There's plenty of cupboard space, so make yourself at home. The kitchen is to your right, but it's not a full kitchen. There's no stove, and there's only an apartment size fridge. There's a microwave if you want to make yourself something quick, though. Like popcorn when you want to invite me over to watch a movie, hint hint."  
  
I smile.  
  
"Point taken."  
  
"Ok. I'm gonna leave you to get settled. Once you feel ready, come on up to the main house, and we'll have something to eat. Ok?"  
  
"Ok. Thanks, Elizabeth."  
  
"You're very welcome. I'll see you soon."  
  
She leaves the guest house, and I'm left alone for the first time since… I unpack my things in the bedroom, taking my suit out of the case and hanging it up carefully. I didn't even know that I packed this, but then again, Donna may have done that for me. I smile. Donna. There's a special girl. I just hope Josh realizes what a treasure he has; before it's too late. About an hour or so goes by, and I'm sitting in one of the chairs on the porch, looking at the expanse of land in front of me. I'm shaken from my thoughts by a knock at the door.  
  
"Come in."  
  
"Hey. These just arrived for you. I didn't look at the card; I figured you'd want to do that."  
  
I get up from my chair and help her carry in the incredibly large arrangement of flowers. We place them on the coffee table, and I hand her the card.  
  
"Would you mind?"  
  
"Not at all."  
  
She opens the envelope, and starts to read. Her emotions become apparent as she reads the card.  
  
"Dear Sam. We have just been informed of your loss, and we wish to express to you our deepest and sincere sympathies. We know how difficult this must be for you; and I wish to remind you of our conversation held in my office yesterday. Family is and will always be more important than anything else in this world. I have asked C.J., Toby and Josh to make the trip to California to be with you; and to act as our representatives, as we unfortunately can not be there to be with you in person. Please know you are in our thoughts and prayers, Sam. With the greatest of affection and support, Josiah, Abigail, Elizabeth, Ellie, and Zoey Bartlet."  
  
She folds up the letter and wipes away a tear from her eyes.  
  
"Wow. I knew he was a wonderful man, but his concern and love for his staff is overwhelming."  
  
"Yeah. It is, isn't it? I should write something; to say thank you."  
  
"Ok. I have some stationary, if you'd like."  
  
"Sure. I'll write a rough draft, then hand write the final copy."  
  
She hands me the letter with a smile, then heads back to the main house for her stationary. I take out my laptop, wait for it to start up, then begin typing what I hope is an adequate response.  
  
"Dear Mr. President, Dr. Bartlet, Elizabeth, Ellie, and Zoey. Thank you ever so much for the beautiful flowers. They arrived just moments ago, and were a great surprise for Elizabeth and I. Lilies and roses were two my mother's favorites, and they were incredibly fragrant; just as I'm sure she would have adored. I don't concretely know about arrangements for everyone's accommodations, but please be re-assured that they will be well taken care of. You didn't have to send them to act as your representatives, Sir. However, I can understand your reasoning, and I appreciate your motives and good wishes. Please believe me when I say that I will be just fine. I'm staying in the guest house on Elizabeth's property, which she says will be best so I can have time to be completely by myself when I feel the need; and I know I will have a great deal of support whenever that need appears as well. I will be sure to place these flowers at my Mother's site in your honor, Sir. My Mother was always one of your biggest supporters, Mr. President, and I know she was so anxious to discover if we are to have another four years in the White House. Again, thank you for your generosity and good wishes, and I will be sure to keep you abreast of events as they occur. Thanking you from the bottom of my heart, Sam."  
  
****  
  
I've left Sam alone in the guest house, after he had a hot bath, hoping he'd take the hint that he needs to get some sleep. I checked on him about an hour ago, and he was resting comfortably on the couch. I'm pleased about that. It's now about three in the afternoon, and I'm on the top floor of the main house, making four of the guest rooms ready for the impending guests, and talking to a caterer on my phone at the same time.  
  
"Yes, I need four of the large veggie platters with mixed dip is just fine, three large fruit platters, two large cheese platters, three, no wait on that. Josh, and Sam. Make that four of the largest meat platters you have, and rolls to go along with that, one per meat slice would be good, I guess. Oh yeah. Dessert. What have you got? Ok. How about two of those, and two of the others. I think that's good. No, I won't need coffee or tea or any drinks; I'll have all that here. China? Oh maybe I should rent that. Luncheon plates? And maybe coffee cups. Cutlery? I don't think that's necessary. It's mostly finger food, right? Oh yeah. Maybe dessert plates and forks. I think that's it. Can you hold on a moment? There's a call on the other line, and I have to get you my card. Ok."  
  
I click over to the other line.  
  
"Hello."  
  
"Hey. Are you ok?"  
  
"Who is this?"  
  
"Elizabeth?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"It's Josh. Where's Sam?"  
  
"I'm sorry, I'm just so tired. Last time I checked, he was sleeping in the guest house; I didn't have the heart to wake him. He's gonna need his strength. Listen Josh, I'm on the other line with the caterer. Can I call you right back? I've got the number on my phone."  
  
"How do you have my number?"  
  
"Call display, Josh."  
  
"Ok. Call me back."  
  
"Ok. Bye."  
  
I click to the other line, and resume my conversation with the caterer.  
  
"Hello? Sorry about that, it was an old friend on the line. Listen, don't you have my card number on file? It would be under Cobourn. That's right. Elizabeth. Yeah. It's the same number, same information. Just put it on the account. Oh yeah, I guess you'll need to know that, won't you. About 4:30 tomorrow. I won't need service staff, just someone to come and set the stuff up, and we can clean it all up, that's no problem. No, I won't need decorations. There will be enough flowers here to cover that. Ok. Thank you very much, and we'll see you tomorrow. Bye."  
  
I hang up, then dial Josh's cell number.  
  
"Josh Lyman."  
  
"Hi, may I speak with Josh, please?"  
  
"May I tell him who's calling?"  
  
"It's Elizabeth."  
  
"Oh hi, Elizabeth. It's Donna."  
  
"Hi, Donna. How are you?"  
  
"Ok, all things considered. More importantly, how are you and Sam holding up?"  
  
"I'm exhausted; he's sleeping. I figured he'd need sleep more than I would."  
  
"I told you yesterday; any friend of Sam's is a friend of ours. You make sure you get some sleep too, ok?"  
  
I smile. She's a sweet girl.  
  
"I will."  
  
"That doesn't sound very convincing, Elizabeth."  
  
"I promise; as soon as I get the opportunity to rest, I will."  
  
"Good. I'll pass you over to Josh. Take care, we'll see you both soon."  
  
"Thanks, Donna."  
  
"Hey, Elizabeth."  
  
"Hi, Josh. What's going on?"  
  
"Well, we're on the plane, and we'll be landing in about an hour."  
  
"Why are you using your phone on a plane? You can get in serious trouble for that, Josh."  
  
"On a commercial plane, yes. This one is just a normal plane, that is, when the President isn't on board."  
  
"He let you take Air Force One?"  
  
"Yes. He told us before we left that we were acting as his representatives, and we were allowed to take the plane. We are taking a commercial flight back, though."  
  
"What a wonderful man he is."  
  
"He is that. Listen, the one thing that we didn't get figured out is the hotel arrangements. Now Donna has been calling…"  
  
"I will not hear of you all staying in a hotel. There is plenty of room here, and I have been making up the guest rooms for you. I won't hear of it."  
  
"Elizabeth, thank you very much, but we couldn't intrude."  
  
I laugh.  
  
"Josh, you've never seen my house, have you?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Trust me, you won't be intruding. There's lots of room. I'd offer to come get you all at the airport, but my car is too small for all of you with your luggage, plus the fact that I haven't slept in about 2 days and I wouldn't want to get into an accident."  
  
"Good point."  
  
"I'll have a driver at the airport waiting for you. Should I have him meet you on the tarmac?"  
  
"Don't worry. The President has seen to it that we have a driver that will take us anywhere we want to go."  
  
I sit on the half-made bed and sigh.  
  
"Ok. When should I expect you all here?"  
  
"Well, I'll call when we land, just to get directions. Ok?"  
  
"You got it. Thanks for coming, Josh. I know it'll mean a great deal to Sam."  
  
"Anything for my best friend."  
  
"Ok. We'll see you soon."  
  
"Bye. Take it easy, and get a little sleep, will ya?"  
  
"I will. Bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
****  
  
I move slightly, and hit the ground with a thud. I guess I'm up now. I glance at the clock on the wall. Oh my god, it's 5:30. I really did sleep. I get off the ground, look in the mirror; not too bad, and head towards the main house. As I approach the main house, I'm welcomed by the sounds of faked injury; then resounding laughter, and then a very girlish sounding whine. I roll my eyes and can't help but smile. Donna smacked him. So Donna's here, which definitely means so is Josh; which definitely means C.J. to keep watch over Josh to make sure he doesn't make an ass of himself; which definitely means Toby watching C.J. to make sure she doesn't kill Josh when he does make an ass of himself. My friends; they really are great. I quietly open the back doors; not wanting to disturb the festivities in the Living Room. I smell the fragrance of Lilies, Roses, Carnations and Lilacs; and it's a lovely aroma to inhale. I lean over one arrangement and read the card.  
  
"My Deepest Sympathies, Sam. Leo"  
  
That's sweet. I have to write him a card. I walk down the hall a little more, and look at another arrangement; this one purple and white lilacs, mixed with white lilies and one white rose.  
  
"We're so sorry, Sam. If there's ever anything we can do, just ask. Love, Josh and Donna."  
  
Awww. Gotta write them a card too. I continue walking around the main floor of the house, not realizing that the conversation has dwindled down as they have noticed me, stopping to smell the flowers and read the numerous cards that have piled up. There's an arrangement from the White House Press Corps, The General Administration, Toby, C.J., Communications Department, Ed and Larry, Ginger and Bonnie; how sweet is that. Jennifer McGarry and Mal? Wow. That's really special. They're gonna get a special thank you. The Senate, Congress, the guys at Dewey/Ballantine, Gage/Whitney, wow. I really do know a lot of people. I breathe in the scent from one of the arrangements, and I feel a hand on my right shoulder.  
  
"Hey. How did you sleep?"  
  
"Ok, I guess. I turned the TV to C-Span, and I fell asleep on the couch. Sorry I slept so long."  
  
She smiles at me.  
  
"It's ok. We have company if you're up for it."  
  
I rub my eyes; partly due to lack of sleep, partly due to holding back tears.  
  
"Sure."  
  
"I was just about to order something to eat. Chinese work for you?"  
  
"Sure, but I'm not really hungry."  
  
"I'll get extra soup, and you can have that. But you need to eat something."  
  
I nod my head.  
  
"Is there any way that I'll win this?"  
  
"Absolutely not."  
  
"Ok. Thanks, Liz. I appreciate all this."  
  
She puts her hand on my cheek and speaks softly.  
  
"You're welcome. Now, if you feel ready, go on in and say hi to everyone ok?"  
  
"Okay."  
  
She heads to the kitchen as I walk into the Living Room, to the sympathetic smiles of everyone gathered there.  
  
"Hey Sam."  
  
"Hi guys. When did you get here?"  
  
"About two hours ago."  
  
"Really? Why didn't you come get me?"  
  
"Well, Elizabeth said that you hadn't slept, and we didn't want to wake you. We know you needed your rest."  
  
"But you still should have come and told me you were here."  
  
"Sam, don't worry about it. We're here, you're here, that's the most important thing. Ok?"  
  
As always, Donna is right.  
  
"Thanks guys. I do appreciate you being here. It means a lot."  
  
"Even if the President hadn't asked us to represent him, mi compadre, we would have been here."  
  
I smile as I sit on the couch beside C.J.  
  
"Thanks."  
  
She puts her arm around me, and gives me a side-by side hug.  
  
"Anytime."  
  
"So what was Josh whining about when I came in? I heard his girlish squeal."  
  
Donna pipes up.  
  
"He was being an idiot."  
  
"Hey! I was not. You should be thankful that I brought you with us."  
  
"Yeah, and what did you say to Toby about that, Josh?"  
  
"I don't remember."  
  
Toby adds his two cents to this conversation.  
  
"You really shouldn't admit that you're cheap to women, Josh. I mean, be cheap if you want; but you'll regret it in the long run."  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about."  
  
"Sam. He told me that he'd bring me here seeing as he knows that I wanted to go to Hawaii, but he figured since California is much cheaper than Hawaii that he would substitute."  
  
I give a wholehearted belly laugh.  
  
"Josh. Buddy. You gotta work on your people skills."  
  
"Tell me about it. I have the war wounds to prove it."  
  
Donna smacks him across the head.  
  
"OW!"  
  
We all share a laugh. Donna gets up and heads to the kitchen.  
  
"Donna, where you goin'?"  
  
"I'm gonna help Elizabeth, if that's alright with you, Joshua."  
  
"You mean, you're going to bring me coffee?"  
  
"No. I'm bringing C.J., Toby and Sam coffee. You can get your own."  
  
I smile. It's good to have your friends around in times of trouble. They really are the best.  
  
****  
  
We're sitting in the Living Room, after finishing gorging ourselves with delicious Chinese food, wine and beer, and we're relaxing, talking about the CWA policy. It's keeping Sam's mind off things for now, and that's ok by me, and I'm sure it's fine by the rest of us.  
  
"So what I don't understand is why Tompson is still opposed? I mean, doesn't he think that this will benefit children?"  
  
"You'd think so, seeing as it's called the Child Welfare Act."  
  
"I hear ya, Donna."  
  
"See, the thing is, Sam. He's an ass. He doesn't think issues through enough, to see the long term results. He only thinks in the short term, and he only wants to know what will benefit him now, not in the future."  
  
"So he's an idiot."  
  
"In a nutshell, yes."  
  
"Well put, Toby."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"I don't know, guys. I mean, it just frustrates me that he can be so blind."  
  
"Sam, he's one of a few idiots that we unfortunate luck of dealing with on a semi-regular basis."  
  
"One of a few? We deal with a lot of idiots."  
  
I smile.  
  
"Ok, you got me. He's one of the few LARGE idiots that we deal with."  
  
"Yeah, the other ones are normal idiots. Like Josh."  
  
Everyone laughs.  
  
"Donnatella!"  
  
She looks at me.  
  
"You bellowed oh master?"  
  
"Oh god, I don't know if I want to hear this."  
  
"Hear what, Sam?"  
  
"Unresolved Sexual Tension. I'm getting out of here."  
  
We all laugh. Even in the midst of a difficult time, he finds the funny.  
  
"You heading out to bed then?"  
  
"Yeah. What time is it, anyway?"  
  
"About 11:30, amore."  
  
"Yeah. I've got a big day tomorrow. I need some sleep."  
  
Donna stands up and walks towards Sam. She puts her hands on his shoulders, and looks him directly in the eyes.  
  
"Sam, I know that we've all averted the subject for your benefit; and I know that you don't like people to worry about you. But…"  
  
Sam lowers his head, trying to hide the flush in his cheeks.  
  
"Sam. We're here for you. Anytime. Ok?"  
  
With that, she wraps her arms around him, and holds him tightly; giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek. He does the same to her, and whispers a thank you in her ear. For some reason, I don't get that jealous pang in my stomach when he does that; I guess because it's Sam.  
  
"Well everyone, I hate to be a party pooper, but I really am quite exhausted. I'm gonna head to bed. Thanks for being here."  
  
"No problem, buddy."  
  
"Have a good night, Sam."  
  
"Thanks."  
  
He gives Donna a smile and she returns it with a gentle touch on the shoulder as he and Elizabeth walk towards the back doors to the Guest House. She walks back into the Living Room and plops herself beside me and rests her head on my shoulder.  
  
"Well, I've got phone calls to make, and a speech to write. I'd better head up for the night too."  
  
"Me too. I'll walk up with you, Toby."  
  
"Thanks, C.J. Good night, guys."  
  
"You too. Sleep well."  
  
"Thanks, Donna. Get some rest, we'll all need it for tomorrow."  
  
"Yeah. We will."  
  
With that, C.J. and Toby head up the stairs, and Donna and I are left alone in the Living Room; sitting on the couch in front of a gentle fire in the fireplace. We sit beside each other in stunned silence for a few moments, then she speaks to me.  
  
"You know, I would have been crushed."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I mean, when you were, you know. The thing. If you hadn't… I would have died."  
  
I run my fingers through her hair and give her a kiss on the top of the head.  
  
"But I didn't, Donna. I'm here. So are you. That's what's important."  
  
"He seems so strong, but I know better. I can sense that about people, you know."  
  
"Yeah. I've always said that you had a sick sense."  
  
"Don't you mean sixth sense?"  
  
"That too."  
  
She gives me a little swat on the arm, and I smile.  
  
"I'm just glad that we can be here for him, like he was there for me; like you all were there for me."  
  
"Well, we wouldn't have been anywhere else, Josh. Just you remember that."  
  
"I won't ever forget. Say, did you want to head up?"  
  
"I think I want to stay here for a bit longer, if it's okay with you."  
  
I smile.  
  
"It's just fine, Donna. It's perfect."  
  
I grab a blanket from behind the couch and I lean back on the couch. She instinctively curls up to me, and I cover her with the blanket. I run my fingers along her back, and through her hair as we both gently drift off to sleep.  
  
****  
  
"If you need anything, Sam. Any time. You just pick up the phone and call me, okay?"  
  
"I will."  
  
"You want some tea to help you sleep?"  
  
"That might be nice, thanks."  
  
"Ok. I'll be back in a few minutes. If you fall asleep in the mean time, don't consider that offensive, Samuel Norman. You need to sleep, so if you want to, close your eyes, and drift off. Ok?"  
  
He smiles.  
  
"Ok, boss."  
  
"Good. I'll be back."  
  
I return about 20 minutes later, two mugs of tea in hand. I left the guest house door ajar, so that I would be able to open it without having to get Sam's help. I walk towards the bedroom quietly, and see a peaceful sight. Sam has pulled the blankets up under his chin, and is sleeping soundly. I put the tea on the table beside the bed, and lean over him, gently tucking him in. He starts to stir.  
  
"It's okay, Sam. It's me."  
  
"Hey. Sorry, I fell asleep."  
  
"It's okay. Go back to sleep."  
  
"Can I ask you a question?"  
  
"Sure you can."  
  
"It's a big favor."  
  
"Anything. What do you need?"  
  
"Well, I wanted to know if you wouldn't mind staying here with me. You know, not like that. Just in case…"  
  
Without words, I walk to the other side of the bed, draw back the blankets and curl myself up beside him. We lay there like that for a few moments, listening to the soft music that is playing on the radio. Sam leans over to me, and rests his head on my chest. I sit up, resting myself on the headboard, and draw him closer to me. I start to run my fingers along his back, in a gentle soothing motion.  
  
"You know, my Mom used to do that when I was sick as a kid."  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry, Sam. I didn't know that."  
  
I stop the motion that my hand is making.  
  
"No, you don't have to stop. It's nice; comforting."  
  
I smile.  
  
"Ok."  
  
I run my other hand along his face, then his forehead, then through his hair, all the while, his arms are wrapped around my waist. I feel a drop of what I'm sure is salty tears on the front of my shirt. I draw him closer to me, holding him tighter. He puts his head in my lap, and brings his legs closer to his body; curling himself up into a ball. I wrap my right arm around his waist, and my left hand is supporting his head, and he cries; the undeniable sobs of heart break and grief.  
  
"Shhh. It's gonna be okay, Sammy. You're gonna be okay."  
  
I know that I may be here for a very long time, as he isn't letting up. But this is Sam; who never shows his emotions, who never really lets anyone through his protective wall; and I feel very honored that he has let me in. So I lean back a little and get comfortable; knowing I could be here all night. I don't mind at all.  
  
****  
  
The sun is shining through the window, and the warm breeze is causing the curtains to blow softly. I've been up for about an hour, but I won't move. Not until he wakes up. He spent most of the night in tears; broken up by the occasional story he would tell me about him and his mother from when he was a child. That would send him back into tears, and me rubbing his back and holding on to him while he cried. He fell asleep about three hours ago, and I just don't have the heart to wake him; he looks so content, despite his very puffy eyes; sore and tired from his free-flowing tears. He starts to stir, and I sit up, still running my fingers through his hair. He looks up at me with sleepy eyes.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Hi. How are you?"  
  
"Ok, I guess. I'm sorry you saw all that, I guess I just…"  
  
"Sam, you needed to let it out, and I m just glad that you let me be here for you. Don't mention it."  
  
He smiles.  
  
"Ok. I think I need to have a shower."  
  
"Ok. When you're ready, come on over. I'll have breakfast ready."  
  
"You don't have to do that, you know."  
  
"I know I don't HAVE to, but I want to. So. Go have your shower, wake yourself up, then we'll all eat breakfast, ok?"  
  
"Ok."  
  
We put our feet on the floor and I start to walk towards the door, not knowing he's following behind me. He puts his hand on my arm.  
  
"Liz?"  
  
I turn to face him.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"What would I ever do without you?"  
  
I smile.  
  
"Probably live a normal life. I'll see you in there."  
  
He pulls me towards him, and he gives me the kind of hug that only Sam can give.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
He gives me a kiss on the top of the head, and I look up at him.  
  
"Go have your shower. You have bed head and need to fix it. Like, right away."  
  
He laughs.  
  
"Ok. I'll see you in a bit."  
  
****  
  
I walk to the main house and find everyone seated at the dining room table. A delicious breakfast has been prepared for everyone. Two different egg dishes, fresh fruit, cheese, toast and coffee; lots of coffee.  
  
"Hey! Morning, Sam."  
  
"Hey, buddy. How'd you sleep?"  
  
He looks at Donna.  
  
"Very well, actually. You?"  
  
"I got a couple of hours. This looks fantastic, Liz. You out did yourself."  
  
"Awww, thanks. It's no trouble; you know I love to cook."  
  
"Don't let this one get away, Sam. A brilliant architect, a cook almost as indulgent as my culinary mentor, Julia Child; and looks that could stop traffic."  
  
She looks at Toby. Hell, we all look at Toby.  
  
"Toby Ziegler. I do believe something nice came from your mouth."  
  
"Hey, I'm a nice guy, C.J. What can I say."  
  
We all share a laugh at Toby's expense as we sit down and enjoy a relaxing breakfast.  
  
Donna and Liz are loading up the dishes, as C.J., Toby, Josh and I head into the Living Room where we will no doubt be talking shop for a while. After a few hours of debating why we think Tompson is an idiot, and the schedules for the next few weeks, Liz looks at the clock on the wall.  
  
"Well, everyone. I hate to have to do this, but Sam, we really should be getting ready. We've got some things to do today."  
  
I nod my head.  
  
"Ok. I'll meet you in about a half hour?"  
  
"You got it. Make yourselves at home, everyone."  
  
"What do you mean? We're coming with…"  
  
"Josh, you don't have to. It's prep stuff right now, then we have the big thing after that."  
  
"Ah. I see."  
  
"Actually, Sam. All of the stuff was pre-arranged. You know that she didn't want to do the whole viewing thing, so that's why it's today. She told me that she had everything taken care of; that she didn't want a viewing because that would be, in her words, `just too damn weird'."  
  
I smile. That's Mom alright.  
  
"She told me when I arrived at the hospital, that she knew it was coming, and she had made her peace with everyone, and that she just wanted to have the ceremony, nothing extravagant because you and I both know that's just the way she was."  
  
"Yeah. She didn't like a whole lot of fuss about her."  
  
"Gee, I wonder where you get that from, Sam."  
  
I look over at Josh.  
  
"You're funny."  
  
"Hey, I try."  
  
"Well, I guess if you all want to get ready and meet us there, that would be good."  
  
"We'll do that, Sam. You just take your time, and we'll see you there, ok?"  
  
"Ok. Thanks for being here guys. It means a lot."  
  
They smile at us as we leave to get ready.  
  
****  
  
Sam and I are walking up the steps of the church, and are greeted by the sympathetic hand of the minister.  
  
"Mr. Seaborn."  
  
"Please, it's Sam. May I introduce you to my friend Elizabeth Cobourn."  
  
"It's my pleasure, Miss."  
  
"Likewise."  
  
"I am very sorry for your loss."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"The service won't be starting for about an hour, so as the guests are filing in, if you'd like to be alone you may feel free to stay in my office. Just down the hall to the left."  
  
"I'll be just fine, Sir. I'd actually like to stay here and greet people; it'll be comforting."  
  
"As you wish. Should you need anything, I'll be in my office. I'll let you know when we're about to begin."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
I run my hand up and down Sam's back a few times.  
  
"How you doin'?"  
  
He breathes deeply.  
  
"Believe it or not, I think I'm ok. I got a lot of it out last night."  
  
I can't help but smile a little.  
  
"Yeah. I remember."  
  
As the guests start to file in, we smile and exchange pleasantries with them. We see Josh, Donna, C.J. and Toby arrive, and I know that we're about to start soon. I put my hand through Sam's arm, and whisper to him.  
  
"We have to go in, Sam. Let's go."  
  
He nods his head, and we turn to walk into the church.  
  
****  
  
Most of this service has been a blur for me. I mean I am pretty good, hell, all of us are pretty good at zoning things out; particularly when the President goes on about the history of the color orange or something like that. One thing that snaps me back into reality, though is this statement; made by the minister.  
  
"At this time, I would like to call upon Mr. Toby Ziegler to share a few words with us."  
  
I look instantly at Liz, who smiles at me; then I snap my head in the direction of the podium. Toby? The minister puts a gentle hand on Toby's back as he clears his throat before beginning to speak.  
  
"Ladies and Gentlemen, honored guests, friends. Sam."  
  
He pauses briefly, as if he's collecting his strength from an unidentifiable source.  
  
"I have been asked to speak on Sam's behalf, to extol the virtues of Marilyn Seaborn, or whom you all know as Mom. I will profess that I did not know Mrs. Seaborn well, yet if the attributes and character of her beloved son are of any testament to her; then I can be assured that she was a woman of great stature, nobility and honor. There have been many times when I have looked at Sam, while we have been working on one project or another, and silently wondered from where he draws his strength. I can say without question that, in every way imaginable, he is his mother's son. Over the past 24 hours I have been told many stories of her generosity, her kindness, compassion and yes, even her insatiable appetite for household discipline; which Sam knows on a first hand basis."  
  
I hear muffled laughter from the people gathered there, and it makes me smile. He's absolutely correct.  
  
"Her character was above reproach, and on the few occasions when on the campaign trail I did meet her; I could say without malice that she loved her son; unconditionally. She supported many local charity groups in California; her local branch of the United Way, and the Red Cross were just two of the philanthropic organizations she gave her time so generously to. Her undying belief that one person could make a difference has reflected in her life, and is now carried on in her son. Trying to find a culmination to this most difficult of speeches has been harrowing at best. Sam, if you thought writing the State of the Union was hard…"  
  
Everyone smiles at that, yet I know all too well how difficult this was for him to write. He is, without doubt, my favorite writer. Even more so than Charles Dickens.  
  
"Mrs. Seaborn's favorite hymn has very beautiful words, and they are most appropriate for such an occasion." He takes out another piece of paper, and begins to read the poetry. As soon as he begins to recite the poem, my head tilts downward, and I feel Elizabeth's arm around my shoulders. She hands me a tissue. "Make me a channel of your peace. Where there is hatred let me bring your love. Where there is injury, your pardon Lord. And where there's doubt, true faith in you. O Master grant that I may never seek, so much to be consoled as to console. To be understood, as to understand. To be loved, as to love with all my soul. Make me a channel of your peace. Where there's despair in life, let me bring hope. Where there is darkness, only light; and where there's sadness, ever joy."  
  
He folds the paper, and walks towards me, not wanting to make eye contact with me. As he gets near me, look up at him and mouth the words `Thank you." He nods his solemn Toby Ziegler acknowledgement, then sits down beside C.J. The minister takes his place at the podium, and begins to speak again.  
  
"Sam, we all join our hearts as one when we say that we will be here for you, whenever you need us."  
  
I nod and lower my head, Elizabeth's arm still around my shoulders.  
  
"There is one final song which is to be played; and there is a letter which is to be read before this song is played."  
  
He opens the paper and begins to read.  
  
"Sammy."  
  
I look at Liz, and she smiles; I smile back.  
  
"One of the things your mother and I talked about was how much she adored you. She was and will always be your biggest fan. She always wanted you to take every opportunity that came to you, and to run with it. She always wanted you to remember that, no matter the size of the person, it's the size of the heart that matters; that the smallest person can overcome the largest of obstacles, if their heart is big enough. Sam, this is something that she asked me to play for you today, as representation of her wishes and hopes for you. All my love…"  
  
I takes her hand and kiss the top of it as the church begins to be filled with the music playing for me; I know this song well and it's just like Mom to have the last word.  
  
"I hope you never lose your sense of wonder. You get your fill to eat; But always keep that hunger. May you never take one single breath for granted. God forbid love ever leave you empty handed. I hope you still feel small; When you stand by the ocean. Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens. Promise me you'll give fate a fighting chance. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance; I hope you dance. I hope you dance. I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance. Never settle for the path of least resistance. Living might mean taking chances; But they're worth taking. Lovin' might be a mistake; But it's worth making. Don't let some hell bent heart Leave you bitter. When you come close to selling out; Reconsider. Give the heavens above More than just a passing glance. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance; I hope you dance. (Time is a wheel in constant motion always) I hope you dance. (Rolling us along) I hope you dance. (Tell me who) I hope you dance. (Wants to look back on their years and wonder) (Where those years have gone) I hope you still feel small; When you stand by the ocean. Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens. Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance. And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance; Dance. I hope you dance. I hope you dance. (Time is a wheel in constant motion always) I hope you dance. (Rolling us along) I hope you dance. (Tell me who) (Wants to look back on their years and wonder) I hope you dance. (Where those years have gone) (Tell me who) I hope you dance. (Wants to look back on their years and wonder) (Where those years have gone)."  
  
****  
  
It's late in the evening. Sam and I and the rest of his friends are sitting in the Living Room, discussing the news events of the day, trying to keep his spirits light. I think; all things considered, that it's working. He turns to me.  
  
"Liz, can you come with me for a second?"  
  
"Sure."  
  
He takes my hand and leads me out of the Living Room towards the kitchen. He stops once we get there and turns to face me.  
  
"How can I ever thank you for all this? I can't think of anything, so I need a little help on that point."  
  
I put my hand up to his face and smile gently.  
  
"Sam. The only thing I ask is that you be happy. It was no trouble at all; I'm just honored that you let me in."  
  
"Yeah. I guess I kinda did last night, didn't I?"  
  
He's cute when he smiles.  
  
"Yeah. I'm glad for that."  
  
"Me too."  
  
We look at each other for a moment, then he straightens himself up and looks at me.  
  
"Listen. We have to head back tomorrow. Leo called and said that we have the plane at our disposal for the return flight, and with the CWA being presented tomorrow afternoon, we need to be there."  
  
I look at him sternly.  
  
"Are you sure you're ok to do this?"  
  
"Liz, if I don't go back now, it'll be harder. I'll throw myself into my work, and make my Mom proud."  
  
"Already done."  
  
He smiles again.  
  
"Ok. We do have to go in the morning, though. I don't want it to be this long again, though."  
  
"Nor do I, Sam. Nor do I."  
  
"I promise to email and call and write when I can."  
  
"I know. You're a busy man, so when you get the chance…"  
  
"I'll make time. Friends are the most important, now."  
  
"Yeah. They are. Speaking of which…"  
  
****  
  
A voice comes over the speaker system.  
  
"Good morning everyone, this is your pilot speaking. We're not at top speed yet, due to a strong easterly wind, yet our arrival time at Regan International will be on time. There may be some turbulence, as the wind is quite strong. So please be advised that it may occur at a moment's notice. Thank you very much, and enjoy your flight."  
  
I'm sitting at the window seat, looking at the clouds that are blocking my view of the earth below. It's been a difficult couple of days, but with the help of my friends, I've pulled through. Donna and Josh have headed down to the kitchen to see if there's something to eat; C.J. and Toby are sitting a few rows behind me fighting about something to do with a Julia Child recipe. They're all nuts. I'm thinking that I should probably get to work on the speech for the thing; seeing as it is on Sunday afternoon. I grab my laptop from the table and place it on my lap; hence why they call it a laptop. As I open the lid, I realize that my eyes are a little more tired than I thought; so I begin the search for my glasses. I get my suit jacket and inspect the inside pocket; where I usually keep them. I find them, but I also find something else. I find an unopened envelope with no name on the front. I can only assume that it's for me; seeing as it is in my coat pocket.  
  
"Hmm. This is strange. I wonder who this is from."  
  
I sit in my chair and I open the envelope. Instantly I recognize the writing, and I can feel my eyes start to tear. Liz must have slipped this into my pocket. I smile as I read the letter.  
  
"My dearest Samuel. I know that this will be strange for you, but I wanted you to have something tangible that you could hold on to when you feel low, or you need me. You've always been my pride and joy, and I will always love you with everything in my heart and soul. Please don't ever forget that, Sam. I love you, always, forever and beyond."  
  
I smile and wipe away the tear that's falling from my eye. She used to say that to me all the time.  
  
"I also wanted to take this opportunity to tell you something that I think you have been either too busy, blind or just plain stupid to see."  
  
Huh?  
  
"There is someone that you are meant to be with, Samuel Norman."  
  
I roll my eyes, smile, and shake my head.  
  
"Don't you roll your eyes at me, young man, because you know darn well that I'm right. I want you to consider this for a moment. She has loved you for a very long time, and I think, deep down, you have loved her too. I know that you live far apart, and that right now things may not be possible. Geographically speaking, you're in DC and she's in CA, and with your re- election victory that I'm POSITIVE you will have in November, there will be another 4 years of long distances. Sam, don't think that I never saw through that. I see how happy you were and always are when she's around; when you've talked, or sent letters to each other. I won't go on and on about this, Son, as there's not much I can do now except to say this. Invite Elizabeth to Washington for a vacation; she's gonna need it. Spend time with her, and I want you to promise me that you'll seriously consider her, you know, in that way. She'd be perfect for you, Samuel, and I know that you're perfect for her. If you don't think that I know what I'm talking about, I'll close this letter by saying this… All my love…"  
  
I sit in my chair; stunned. I'm completely stunned. I wipe away the remnants of the tears that have fallen from my eyes while I was reading that letter. My mother is trying to fix me up with… I get out my cell phone from my briefcase and dial some familiar numbers. As soon as I hear the voice on the other end of the phone greet me with, I smile; and lean back into my chair.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"All my love…"  
  
****  
  
The End. 


End file.
